A wrap to 2009!

In less than an hour I will have to be on my way to church where I plan to usher in Year 2010, so I will keep this blog short and hopefully sweet.

In many parts of the world they are already in 2010, and in a matter of hours we'll be there too. As I look forward to the new year in anticipation, I am compelled to look at the year 2009 in reflection.

It's been quite a difficult year, we lost friends along the way and many people lost their jobs however God kept and sustained my loved ones and I, and for that I am grateful.

I know 2010 will be an awesome year in which we will experience God in an awesome way, and as I type off my last blog for 2009, it is my prayer that God expands, every aspect of our life, be it our finances, creativity, families etc. I pray God's blessings on all my followers and we'll meet same spot in 2010, with awesome blogs.

Take care and stay blessed!

Mr. Right

I have worked in retirement long enough to make a few observations....am I an expert...no , just a mere observer.

In retirement living you meet all sorts of seniors- comedians, flirts, diva, casanova, and even the most miserable pple ever.

The best of these are usually the couples...and the little research that I have done shows that they are the most happiest in the group. Almost always content they hardly ever complain. most admirable is the love that they have for each other... what I believe is true love. From pushing a spouse around in their wheelchair or walker, to accompanying them to the front door, just to part with them for a few moments as the other goes to the bakery or store across the street, to fetching a cup of tea,to making those daily trips to the nursing home or hospital to see an ailing spouse or the silence in which a couple sits and just holds hands as they wait for their room to be cleaned and everything in between , one can't help but observe and admire how these actions are often done with so a lot of love.

Then I begin to wonder...does this type of love still exist? Sixty plus years of being together...what could possibly be the glue to that holds people for decades.I mean a quick look around, there are sky-rocketting divorce rates around us. So what is it that these seniors know, have or do that we don't? For starters they have lived longer than we have and yeah they've been there done that and we have a lot to learn from them.

Slight detour. A friend asked me how I expected to meet Mr Right if I spent all my weekends at home. Truth be told I do not go out that much.And I will confess that I would rather spend my weekend at home than go clubbing.It was while we talking abt this that I kind of made refernce to our older citizens and I got thinking or wondering what their secret(s) may be.

First of I do not mean to burst people's bubble,and am no expert on love, however after a few shots at this thing called love I feel I could throw my 2 cents on the subject. I do not believe in Mr. Right. I think from the time we grow up, we are caught up in prince charming rescues damsel in distress notion.as we upgrade to novels and movies we get caught up in the same notion, so most of us young women end up believing that he is out there...Mr. Right is out there, and at the right time nd place our paths will cross and we'll live happily ever after.And so we set standards(nothing wrong with standards) and we come up with qualities that he must have,and so even when we meet an awesomely great guy, because he is not 6 feet tall, and doesn't drive a BMW, and doesn't dress up in a suit and tie we automatically give them the red cars and tell them to get-a-steeping.

Friend wasn't too happy when I told her that I think that I will be one of those people who might end up alone.I know...your brain maybe going on overdrive trying to figure me out, but read on I will explain in a few. I believe that no one knows me better than I know myself. I've had my qualities too that I look for in a guy, based on who I am am , and where I see myself going. Some of these qualities have been realistic some not, and I have tried to lower my standards and I have ended up settling for less than I deserve.And what exactly is it that she deserves you may wonder?

I choose to answer this by looking at our senior counterparts...and this is how I feel I deserve to be loved.I ought to be truly loved... unconditionally, honestly and patiently, beyond my faults and looks...because when the toll of the yrs has taken all the elasticity of my muscles and body parts start hanging, and wrinkles take residence on my face and am possibly senile I would love to have someone who sees the soul in me and not my mental or physical state.I am not looking for perfect love or the right love, because according to my facts we are imperfect beings, and are incapable of perfect love. Only one being has been able to show perfect love , and that was Jesus.

Back to our generation. I think we have lost our values,and the first sign of hardship we punk out. Yet those before us have been through the Great depression, and wars, and many other life challenges and yet they maintained their resilience and still managed to thrive at love. Fast forward today, we have more technological advances...supposedly to make our life easier yet, we fail to have backbone. The first guy who passes our way we drool at him, and justify our actions as being harmless..."just appreciating", forgetting that everything starts as a thought and that thought stems into an action and before we know it we do not even fight for wat we have coz we have the 'eye-candy' option.

Back to friend and our converstion about supposed Mr. Right, I think that in today's world, very few people would love this old soul the way she deserves to be love. And because I haven't quite figured out how I am going to know if a guy can love me the way I deserve to be loved, I told my friend that I think that I will take a chill pill from the dating scene, and work on me. See all truth is parallel, and I got my flaws too...so I cannot expect what I cannot deliver. The fairy tales have become a mind set and I have to go back to the drawing board and ask the Master to teach me how to love, coz this trying to figure out things on my own has gotten me caught up in a web of a mess.

If I am going to love someone I have to love them right. And the same applies to me if someone is to love me they have to love me right. I owe it to God,and that person who will end up with me in some retirement centre someday, and I owe that to myself.

the underwear affair....

That title sounds juicy doesn't it...lol! ok ok before we all get our heads in the gutter, lemme expagorate a wee bit.

As some of you may know, earlier this year I had a lumpectomy.The months leadng up to this procedure were pure torture, however i had the best healthcare team one could ever ask for.It was during this whole boobage ordeal that it hit me... I was benefitting from years of research and medical advances. And so it was that I told myself that this year I will participate in a walk foe Cancer. Initially I was going to do one for breast cancer, but then I found out about some types of cancer that were 'under-represented'.By that I mean that their research is underfunded and very few people know about them yet thousands of peeople die yearly due to these types of cancers. These are cancers of "where the sun don' shine" a.k.a Below the waist cancers - prostrate, colorectal, gynecolic and bladder cancers.

Aug. 29, we'll do a 5K walk in support of this cause. It's called the Underwear affair, and we'll drop everything to support this great cause. I am proud to be a part of this event and am hoping this will be the start to may years of fundraising with the hope that one day there may be a cure for all cancers.

Please drop by my page, read, and get informed and most importantly please donate; Just click on Underwear affair

Bring On Summer!

So the end of my school year is nigh, and no one could be more happier than mina mselufu! Next week I write my exams, and then schools out !!!!

If one person is excited about summer that will be mwa...and no I won't complain about the heat toasting my skin, nor the smog that will affect my breathing...I intend to enjoy summer to the fullest.

Here's my summer line up:

June - I got Steph's wedding to attend Yeah! then end of the month I take a wee lil vacay! We usher in July with my niece's wedding and I'm in the bridal party, I am so excited yay! August sees me in the the beautiful province of British Columbia with family. I am so looking forward to spending time with my niece and 2 nephews! Could I ask for a better line up... me don think so!

Current State of Affairs

Exhaustion, stress seem to be the order of the day. 3 more weeks of school, and yet somehow the furnace seems to be seven times hotter.Essays, assignments exam prep...you name it I have it going on. I knew I'd run into days like these however, most of the year has been a breeze with a few hiccups here and ther, but nothing too major. I've been tempted to give up, but I am not a quitter, besides I have invested a whole for me to give up now. It's already been a year...oh my where did the time go. I feel like a pregnant woman... bursting with excitement, and at the same time hostage to the fear of the unknown. The end is in sight yet I feel like I am starting to get tired of pushing, yet my assurance lies in God's Grace.I know that one more push and I will birth my 1st year to fruition. I am banking on His Grace to see me through the end of this year, then I can focus of having an awesome summer.

Is HE the ONE ? THE RIGHT ONE?

Got this from a friend.Some powerful stuff!! Again no lawsuits please just some vital info that I am sharing with y'all. I didn't pen this.

First we must allow our Heavenly Father to do the
picking. And second, the decision for a mate must be
made on a spiritual and intellectual basis before it's
made on an emotional one.

'What about love? Shouldn't that be the third? you
ask. No, and I'll tell you why. 'The heart is
deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can
understand it? ( Jeremiah 17:9).

The heart is willful and is driven by its own agenda.
It does not consider things rationally and
intelligently it just loves to love! Therefore you
have to point it in the right direction: 'Above all
else, guard your heart, for it is the well spring of
life' (Proverbs 4:23)!
Whenever you meet a man, you need to get clearance
from God, check out his attributes, and then allow
your heart to engage.

Dating exists not for mating; it exists for collecting
data. I believe that the biblical design would be
friendship, courtship and then marriage.

Friendship is two people walking together in agreement
and accountability, learning and growing together.

Courtship follows the mutual agreement to commit to
one another exclusively - it is the decisive turning
toward the agreed-upon goal of the marriage altar. It
is a period of laying a foundation and preparing your
life together after marriage.

But dating? Well, if you do date, use the time wisely
to gather these facts.

1. Check out the fabric. Is the person mate material?
Does this man have an intimate relationship with the
Father through Jesus Christ ? Does he care what God
thinks about his behavior? Is he accountable to God
as well as another co-laborer in the faith?
Accountability is an important factor. It is
imperative to maintaining a committed relationship. Is
your potential spouse a member of the same family;
the family of God?

You need to have common values and agree
on the essentials of living day to day. You may
enjoy a lot of similar things, have like interests,
like goals in life but make sure you also have like
opinions on basic life issues.

Though there is some truth to the idiom that opposites
attract, like-minded folks fare better together.

Furthermore, does he want to get married? If you want
to be married and your dreamboat isn't interested,
don't waste your time.

Remember, women fall in love and get married. Men
decide to get married and then look for a wife. Note
the difference in order. So if a guy says he's not
looking for anything serious, take his words
seriously. If he's not going in your direction, get
off the bus and wait for the right one.

2. Does this man want you? Is he pursuing you? The man
who is right for you will pursue you, and God's hand
in the relationship will be clear. No guessing, no
fleeces, no dead ends.

Scripture says: 'He who finds a wife finds what is
good and receives favor from the Lord' (Proverbs
18:22).

Note - who finds whom? THE MAN FINDS THE WIFE.
From the beginning of time, God has transported men
and women across the world in order to put them together.

At the RIGHT TIME, He will bring that man on the scene
and he will find you. In God's perfect design, the man
is the one who recognizes his mate. Adam had no
problem recognizing that Eve was his missing rib. You
do not need to strategically place yourself anywhere.
You don't have to help a guy out because he's shy!

Men will do whatever they have to do to get what they
truly want. The man in your life should recognize you
as the pearl of great price in his life and be willing to
do whatever he must in order to gain your hand. If he
is passive about gaining your affection, take it as a
sign that he is not interested.

Many a woman's mother has suggested that it is a good
idea to marry a man who loves you more than you love
him. As cold as that sounds, it actually might be
scriptural if you stop to think about it: 'We love him
because he first loved us' (1 John 4:19). Until then,
take the ultimate chill pill. You don't need a bunch
of men in your life to make you feel all right about
yourself.

You need only one man - your man, the one God has
selected to select you. And trust me, the right man at
the wrong time can be just as awful as the wrong man
at any time. So trust God's timing in this. He is the
ultimate matchmaker. Relax, sit pretty and allow
yourself to be found. Again - WAIT until the man
voices his intentions. He should take the lead in
establishing the relationship. You may have an inkling
that he is the one, but God will use the man to set
the tone of the relationship. Allow him the
opportunity to woo you - this is your first act of
submission. Jesus set the standard for all men to
follow. They should love us first. And they should
lead the relationship.

3. The man in your life should not desire to move into
your house, only into your heart. A man who prepares
for your future has made his intentions clear. A man
who is husband material has the means to take care of
a wife. He is a responsible human being who
understands he needs to have something to offer. In
short, a man should have the means to be a suitable
lover for you .

4. Check out his buddies. Everyone knows birds of the
same feather flock together, yet most women fail to
see the connection between a man and his friends. A
man's pals tell you a lot about the person that you
haven't seen yet. They reveal things about the guy's
character that might be hidden when he is on good
behavior. Everyone knows how to put his best foot
forward. Don't stay focused on the foot, check out the
rest of the body!

5. Check out his relationship with his mother. How
does he treat her? This is your preview of how he will
treat you. There are lots of men who, because of a
negative relationship with their mothers, really don't
like women, yet say they do. Unresolved issues between
mother and son could continue between husband and wife.

6. Remember that a man's family reveals the cloth from
which he's cut. Take note and decide whether you want
your future with the man in your life to look like his
present family situation.

7. Check out the patterns of his life. Do you see
repeated cycles of drama in his personal kingdom?
Broken relationships? Problems in making commitments
--including the job market? Mood swings? Is a problem
always someone else's fault? Does he embrace
responsibility or shirk it? Does he keep his promises?
Is he a man of good reputation? Remember all garments
look wonderful hanging in the store, but with wear,
some begin to unravel. Give yourself time and space to
check out the man in your life. Time will always
reveal whether or not he is made of the right stuff.

8. Does this man have a vision for his life? Is he
running with that vision? Remember, God decided Adam
needed help once Adam got busy DOING his assignment.
As we saw Adam, a man doesn't need help until he is
busy doing what he was created and called to do. Is
the man in your life guided by sense of destiny and
purpose, or does he just allow life to happen around
him? A man who is not certain of his mission can be
the most miserable person - and you'll be miserable
too if you know where YOU want to go in life.

A man who has vision is not intimidated by a woman
whose mission statement is clear. He will be your best
ally, cheerleader and assistant because he wants you
both to make it! A man who cannot be supportive of
your achievements because he is floundering in a sea
of uncertainty over his own life is not a healthy
partner to have and to hold forever.

Creating dependencies or feelings of obligation is not
the way to get the best out of your man. Somewhere
along the way, he will resent you and flee from the
smothering burden of obligation he associates you
with. You want a man who is firmly anchored in his
identity in Christ. Remember, we are looking for a
man who will be priest and leader of his home. His
first instinct should be to want to cover you, redeem
you, and provide for you. Your job is to decide if
this is the man God has ordained for you to
complement.

9. Complimentary. Do your talents and gifts complement
his? Do his gifts compliment yours? What about your
temperaments? Do you see the two of you as an
effective team capable of bringing blessing to the
lives of those around you? Do your futures mesh? Can
you coordinate your gifts in an attractive and
effective way?

This is why knowing your purpose is so important. Make
sure your hearts beat for mutual causes. When I go
shopping I always consider the fabric, the fit and
what I already have in my closet. Will my next
purchase be a complimentary addition to what I already
have? If I find that I am going to have to buy shoes
and matching accessories to go with a new outfit, I
leave it right on the rack. It is too expensive a
proposition. If the man you meet makes you feel that
you need to completely reinvent yourself, something
is wrong.

This is where I ask you to consider the relationship
in terms of cost. Is this relationship expensive
spiritually, emotional or physically? Does your
longing for a mate make you willing to forfeit who you
are in the process? Or does he see you as the gift
that you are? The man in your life should consider you
a rare find, a priceless jewel because of you he is
getting ready to get blessed big-time! Any
relationship that causes you to feel unworthy,
unlovely, unacceptable, undesirable or that you have
to work for love, is too expensive!

God has called the man to cover, protect and provide
not only materially for a woman, but emotionally and
spiritually as well. You should be richer in mind,
body and spirit for your union with the man of your
dreams. The man in your life should make rich deposits
into your heart and spirit, not withdrawals.

10. Does he have a healthy love and acceptance of
himself? Make sure the man in your life has taken time
to heal from past relationships and has made peace
with himself. How he cares for himself is how he will
care for you. A man's relationship with God is
crucial here. His love for himself will only be as
strong as his love for God. This is not something that
you can impart. You cannot be his savior or teacher.
That is out of spiritual order. In his rightful place
as your personal priest, he should be leading you to a
richer relationship with Christ .

If he is causing you to compromise your faith and
destabilize your walk, if he is leading you into
sexual sin or causing you to be distracted from your
commitment to God, the relationship is too expensive.
Offending the Lover of your soul, who promises you
eternal love, is too high a fare to pay for a ride
that has a limited run. If you and your man can't soar
in the Spirit, when the force of your love for another
is tested by the pull or gravity of the world, your
union will not be able to survive.

So you decide. How much is your life worth? How much
is your love worth? You will be able to accept only
what you believe you deserve. God himself calculated
the worth of your love and decided it was worth His
life. He now pledges you His love for eternity. Yes,
Jesus sets the example for all others to follow when
He paid a ransom for His bride. Should you expect less
from a mortal man? Throughout the Biblical age, men
were willing to pay the cost for what they truly desired.
The truth of the matter is everyone knows that anything
worth having, costs and no one gets a ride in this life for
free.

Our prayer:
Dear Heavenly Father God,

I confess that I have not always been as careful as I
should've been with my heart. From time to time, my
desire for love has caused me to leave my heart in the
wrong hands. I now commit my heart into Your hands for
safekeeping. Please help me to stop being so impulsive
with what you deem so precious. As I learn to
celebrate Your love for me, let me learn from Your
example what a bridegroom should really be like. Help
me to never settle for less than what you desire for
me. As I embrace You as the Lover of my soul, keep my
affections in the haven of Your own heart.
I ask that You take over this area of my life. Keep me
from those You know would hurt my heart. I invite You
to set a hedge around me and keep me from all who
would draw me into unfruitful relationships until the day
you present me to the mate that You have selected for
me. Grant me the discernment to recognize him as he
recognizes me. Cleanse me from the temptation to
typecast the men I meet according to what I see. Help
me to trust in Your knowledge and lean not on my own
understanding. I know that You know what is best for
me; therefore I yield to Your choice. In Jesus ' Name.
Amen.

Ladies this is something you should definitely share
with a friend, whether you are single or married. It is
something to think about, when you ask is 'He' the one?

beat and in serious need of a vacay.

the date - Apr 7/09, weather - cold, blowing snow, Mood - indifferent. Time - 407pm...and with that I think to myself 53 mo mins, and then I am on my way to skool. To be quite frank today I is one of those days that I really wish i could go straight home and enjoy the warmth of my bed, but i gotta head out to skool. I really feel beat... a day @ the spa would do me good. Oh Ya 6 mo weeks of this torture and I am done. Got a research paper coming up on Tuesday, and I haven't picked a topic yet, and the sad and funny truth is that in all my days @ uni I recall going past one library - sez a lot about what type of student I am huh!Anyway the Easter weekend will be here,I have Good Friday off and I will work on it. Sat.and Sunday find me @ work but Monday I'll do my last stretch on Monday , and Tuesday my paper will be ready for submission.Oh how I wish I could get on a plane and go away.
Haaa I really miss home, tht's the next big thing I am working on. I think if I go home I'll come back energized and ready to take on skool.

Victory...but @ wat /whose cost?

Today is one of the days that have been almost normal for me sans the desire to catch up with sleep. The Past few months have been insane leading up to our accreditation by the governing body of all retirement homes in Ontario. As though the prep for all that wasn't enough, add to the mix, tax receipts that had to be prepared by yours truly, and top that with exams.

Amid all the insanity I made a really good friend, someone who though so far away was always so near in spirit.Someone who gave me the strength to keep going, even when many a time I felt so overwhelmed, and someone who prayed for me all the time. However in all that was going on, I kinda missed the point and I took out all my frustrations, fatigue, and all that was overwhelming me on my new found friend.

In all this I made a very stupid decision and said things that I was not meant to say, and though we are still friends, my actions have changed the dynamics of our friendship. Back to the accreditation... we passed with flying colours and not a single recommendation ( quite good for us as it was our first certification ever.) Now we can gunner for the Award of Excellence. While all this is great and awesome, I think to myself the price I've had to pay for all this is not worth it at all.I am exhausted, my studies have been a bit on hold, and I hurt a good friend in the process. So while pple at work are still rejoicing, my happiness was short-lived, because in this whole process I have lost so much , and most of wat I've lost can't be replaced at all.

Of weighty and skinny issues

So I get this call from my aunt, saying she was calling to check on me and so on. We ask each other the usuals, health , work and family. THen she tells me she was talking to Mr M____. (I can't remember his name, all I remember is it starts with the letter M.) I ask her who that be...and her reply is some man from Gwanda and apparently she dated him or his bro. AM thinking ok this convo's about to get juicy, coz me and Auntren have neva has this type of convo. Anywho am still clueless,and still looking to the juicy part of this thambo. She goes on to tell me he is a professor in the states, and so is his wife. They are well off , and she works part- time, the rest of the time is spent managing their chalets...am still on the msipha part but am hopeful that the juicy thambo part is coming.

So auntren sez she and this Mr. M____. were talking. Apparently Mr M____. has a son my age who is doing his PhD.and Auntren thought it would be a grand idea to hopok the 2 of us up. Now I feel like I had a piece of liver with the gall bladder still attached to it. So I protest and the speech abt how abantu beGwanda need to stick to each each...and yada yada.

Then Auntren gives me a kick below the belt. Though the kick is deleivered in Philly , I feel the impact all the way in T.O. She sez but my dear u gotta lose sum weight!!...in my mind am thinking Oh no she didn't! Anyway I keep quiet coz i wasn't expecting this blow.After abt a second...though it feels like forever i find the voice in me and I yell at her. Needless to say the convo ends on a sour note and me and auntren haven't had the best of conversations since then!

Don't get me wrong, its not that us big pple do not like to hear the truth we do, as long as it's not about our weight. Weight is just a weighty issue. I lived with a girl who had a baby and was still tinier than I was. She ate more than I did, but still weighed less. Us thick sisters..try our best to keep the pounds off, and as though it aint enuff that we have to stick to the ugliest set of clothes ( which until today I think are desgined by our skinny counterparts, the last thing we eva wanna hear is someone becoming the Dr. Phil of our Lives( that last part sounds like a soap opera)

Anyway before I wrap up the conversaion with Auntren, I tell her that I luv my boday the way it is and I wouldn't change a thing abt it. I am very healthy, the doctor said my blood pressure was beautiful.If someone has a problem with my weight then the dude best not be coming my way to tell me he luvs me...coz i'll tell him to go hang!

That being said, it is with great news and pride that i wanna mention that yours truly has shed a few pounds and inches and to celebrate I hooked me up with a pair of skinny jeans. It feels good to slip into clothes that i'd put away and even better to put the clothes I'd been wearing away.

i'll keep doing wat I am doing and who knows by summer I could have a perfect beach body....ummm in my mind maybe...well y'all can't blame a sis for using her imagination, can u.

To those who struggle with weight or any other issues at the expense of other pple.Have some backbone, take a stand and be proud of who u are , do not let someone rub their insecurities on you and let them get u thinking less of yourself.

back to skool

So the strike is over, after 3 long months and my 2 cents on the matter it was a silly strike. York has one of the highest paid TA, in the province and possibly in the country yet they were demanding more. Then again, just about everything has gone up pricewise. The Uni wouldn't budge...and who gets screwed in the process...us the students...the very pple who pay large sums of $$ and sacrifice a lot to get a fundamental service.

Anyway I was at Uni today to get a few books...and I ran into a reporter from a local paper. Didn't give her my name but we had a good interview.She asked questions and I gave her my 2 cents. Anyway Monday we go to skool , and its a bittersweet moment..the students get to continue with their education, while nothing has been resolved with staff...basically they have been forced to head back. You'd wonder why the government waited 3 mnths to force the strikers back to work , and also u ask yourself if this back to work legislation solves the issue.

Anyway, I know that the days ahead will not be easy...there is a lot to be covered and I will be scarce on the blogosphere and facebook. I will pop in from time to time to give my 2bhobho on various issues.

A Moment in time

As I sit to pen ( type up) this blog a rush of lyrics rush to mind ; Give me one moment in time- Whitney Houston, A new day has come - Celine Dion, For a Moment like this some people wait a lifetime- Kelly Clarkson, I believe in the impossible - Fantasia....I could go on and on...so let me stop right now because I could get carried away.

All the lyrics above could apply to one moment or day.January 20, 2009 will forever be in our history books. Forget different time zones,backgrounds, races, political and religious affiliations,everyone took a moment to witness and be a small part of a historical moment. Whether you were tuned in on the telly , internet, radio or were there in person, one way or another it was a day the world tood still. From Rick Warren's prayer( Gosh I wish I could pray like that) to Miss Franklin's soulful singing..to the main event of the day...we all forgot abt our differences and seemed to be unified by one individual - Barack Obama.

As a black person(even though my skin colour is brown) I felt proud...because finally, a black man is in power in the US, something which may have been impossible. For white people they were happy, because they know the struggles we have faced due to the colour of our skin. In the heavens above, the Likes of Dr Martin Luther King and all those slaves ( Those who toiled in plantations, with the sun baking their backs whilst cruel masters hurled insults and beat them mercilessly, those who were lynched - crucified and torched to death for being black, I am also talking about those brothers and sisters who were tied to two horses facing different directions...and those horses would be whipped and they's run amok in opposite directions, splitting a live human in half all the way to his death. I am also talking aout those who died in the vast oceans, either due to disease, the heart ache from being seperated from the motherland and loved ones or those who tried to escape from the slavery ships etc)were rejoicing up above.

You see this has been a long time coming for black people and everything comes full circle. When Dr. King said he had a dream, he was halfway down the journey... he dreamt the dream...and he died after.His dream didn't die there, those left behind carried it on..over he years and Obama realized the dream. We were kings in Africa...were reduced to slaves and now we ware back on top.

You see our black skin represents our resilience...we can be beat but that doesn't kill our spirit. Yesterday was all about being there, so that in years to come we will tell our children it happened in our day. The young ones will tell their kids that instead of saying 'mama' and 'dada' as their first words, their first word was Obama.Children born around this day will be named Obamason, Obamaness, Obamakazi...u name it the list goes one coz y'all know we black folk are creative with names.

A few lessons i have learnt from Obamania... My African name or My Africaness is no barrier to success. I am proud to be African...but more so now than ever. Love and Hope extend beyond any race. Having a dream is no item of ridicule, because dreams can come true, maybe not in one's lifetime but they do come true, and lastly God can turn every impossibility into a possibility.

As I wrap up I pray God bestowes wisdom on Obama, because we all know, he is guiding a ship in uncertain waters, and as much as we're happy see a black man in power, there are a few who would like to see him fail. Only God knows why he has chosen a time like this to allow a man like Obama, to lead the world. I pray for God's divine protection, on America's first family and ask His Ministering Angels to watch over them.

A History Maker!

I am living in a day where just abt every invention has been made...and there really isn't much one can to do go into the History Books...unless if you are Barack Obama...America's 44th president and more importantly the first black prez of the the world's super power.

I will get back to Obama's presidency in another entry, but the purpose of this blog is to share his speech...In my books this was Mother of all speeches.It wasn't just a well written speech, but it was also a well executed speech too.
*** Please note... I did not write this speech,and I do not own any bit of it ..so please don go trying to sue me...I don't have a fat bank account either.

OBAMA: My fellow citizens:
I stand here today humbled by the task before us, grateful for the trust you have bestowed, mindful of the sacrifices borne by our ancestors. I thank President Bush for his service to our nation, as well as the generosity and co-operation he has shown throughout this transition.
Forty-four Americans have now taken the presidential oath. The words have been spoken during rising tides of prosperity and the still waters of peace. Yet, every so often the oath is taken amidst gathering clouds and raging storms. At these moments, America has carried on not simply because of the skill or vision of those in high office, but because we the people have remained faithful to the ideals of our forebears, and true to our founding documents.
So it has been. So it must be with this generation of Americans.
That we are in the midst of crisis is now well understood. Our nation is at war, against a far-reaching network of violence and hatred. Our economy is badly weakened, a consequence of greed and irresponsibility on the part of some, but also our collective failure to make hard choices and prepare the nation for a new age. Homes have been lost; jobs shed; businesses shuttered. Our health care is too costly; our schools fail too many; and each day brings further evidence that the ways we use energy strengthen our adversaries and threaten our planet.
These are the indicators of crisis, subject to data and statistics. Less measurable but no less profound is a sapping of confidence across our land - a nagging fear that America's decline is inevitable, and that the next generation must lower its sights.
Today I say to you that the challenges we face are real. They are serious and they are many. They will not be met easily or in a short span of time. But know this, America - they will be met.
On this day, we gather because we have chosen hope over fear, unity of purpose over conflict and discord.
On this day, we come to proclaim an end to the petty grievances and false promises, the recriminations and worn out dogmas, that for far too long have strangled our politics.
We remain a young nation, but in the words of scripture, the time has come to set aside childish things. The time has come to reaffirm our enduring spirit; to choose our better history; to carry forward that precious gift, that noble idea, passed on from generation to generation: the God-given promise that all are equal, all are free and all deserve a chance to pursue their full measure of happiness.
In reaffirming the greatness of our nation, we understand that greatness is never a given. It must be earned. Our journey has never been one of shortcuts or settling for less. It has not been the path for the faint-hearted - for those who prefer leisure over work, or seek only the pleasures of riches and fame. Rather, it has been the risk-takers, the doers, the makers of things - some celebrated but more often men and women obscure in their labour, who have carried us up the long, rugged path towards prosperity and freedom.
For us, they packed up their few worldly possessions and travelled across oceans in search of a new life.
For us, they toiled in sweatshops and settled the West; endured the lash of the whip and plowed the hard earth.
For us, they fought and died, in places like Concord and Gettysburg; Normandy and Khe Sahn.
Time and again these men and women struggled and sacrificed and worked till their hands were raw so that we might live a better life. They saw America as bigger than the sum of our individual ambitions; greater than all the differences of birth or wealth or faction.
This is the journey we continue today. We remain the most prosperous, powerful nation on earth. Our workers are no less productive than when this crisis began. Our minds are no less inventive, our goods and services no less needed than they were last week or last month or last year. Our capacity remains undiminished. But our time of standing pat, of protecting narrow interests and putting off unpleasant decisions - that time has surely passed. Starting today, we must pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and begin again the work of remaking America.
For everywhere we look, there is work to be done. The state of the economy calls for action, bold and swift, and we will act - not only to create new jobs, but to lay a new foundation for growth. We will build the roads and bridges, the electric grids and digital lines that feed our commerce and bind us together. We will restore science to its rightful place, and wield technology's wonders to raise health care's quality and lower its cost. We will harness the sun and the winds and the soil to fuel our cars and run our factories. And we will transform our schools and colleges and universities to meet the demands of a new age. All this we can do. And all this we will do.
Now, there are some who question the scale of our ambitions - who suggest that our system cannot tolerate too many big plans. Their memories are short. For they have forgotten what this country has already done; what free men and women can achieve when imagination is joined to common purpose, and necessity to courage.
What the cynics fail to understand is that the ground has shifted beneath them - that the stale political arguments that have consumed us for so long no longer apply. The question we ask today is not whether our government is too big or too small, but whether it works - whether it helps families find jobs at a decent wage, care they can afford, a retirement that is dignified. Where the answer is yes, we intend to move forward. Where the answer is no, programs will end. And those of us who manage the public's dollars will be held to account - to spend wisely, reform bad habits, and do our business in the light of day - because only then can we restore the vital trust between a people and their government.
Nor is the question before us whether the market is a force for good or ill. Its power to generate wealth and expand freedom is unmatched, but this crisis has reminded us that without a watchful eye, the market can spin out of control - and that a nation cannot prosper long when it favours only the prosperous. The success of our economy has always depended not just on the size of our gross domestic product, but on the reach of our prosperity; on our ability to extend opportunity to every willing heart - not out of charity, but because it is the surest route to our common good.
As for our common defence, we reject as false the choice between our safety and our ideals. Our founding fathers, faced with perils we can scarcely imagine, drafted a charter to assure the rule of law and the rights of man, a charter expanded by the blood of generations. Those ideals still light the world, and we will not give them up for expedience's sake. And so to all other peoples and governments who are watching today, from the grandest capitals to the small village where my father was born: know that America is a friend of each nation and every man, woman, and child who seeks a future of peace and dignity, and that we are ready to lead once more.
Recall that earlier generations faced down fascism and communism not just with missiles and tanks, but with sturdy alliances and enduring convictions. They understood that our power alone cannot protect us, nor does it entitle us to do as we please. Instead, they knew that our power grows through its prudent use; our security emanates from the justness of our cause, the force of our example, the tempering qualities of humility and restraint.
We are the keepers of this legacy. Guided by these principles once more, we can meet those new threats that demand even greater effort - even greater co-operation and understanding between nations. We will begin to responsibly leave Iraq to its people, and forge a hard-earned peace in Afghanistan. With old friends and former foes, we will work tirelessly to lessen the nuclear threat, and roll back the spectre of a warming planet. We will not apologize for our way of life, nor will we waver in its defence, and for those who seek to advance their aims by inducing terror and slaughtering innocents, we say to you now that our spirit is stronger and cannot be broken; you cannot outlast us, and we will defeat you.
For we know that our patchwork heritage is a strength, not a weakness. We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus - and non-believers. We are shaped by every language and culture, drawn from every end of this earth; and because we have tasted the bitter swill of civil war and segregation, and emerged from that dark chapter stronger and more united, we cannot help but believe that the old hatreds shall someday pass; that the lines of tribe shall soon dissolve; that as the world grows smaller, our common humanity shall reveal itself; and that America must play its role in ushering in a new era of peace.
To the Muslim world, we seek a new way forward, based on mutual interest and mutual respect. To those leaders around the globe who seek to sow conflict, or blame their society's ills on the West - know that your people will judge you on what you can build, not what you destroy. To those who cling to power through corruption and deceit and the silencing of dissent, know that you are on the wrong side of history; but that we will extend a hand if you are willing to unclench your fist.
To the people of poor nations, we pledge to work alongside you to make your farms flourish and let clean waters flow; to nourish starved bodies and feed hungry minds. And to those nations like ours that enjoy relative plenty, we say we can no longer afford indifference to suffering outside our borders; nor can we consume the world's resources without regard to effect. For the world has changed, and we must change with it.
As we consider the road that unfolds before us, we remember with humble gratitude those brave Americans who, at this very hour, patrol far-off deserts and distant mountains. They have something to tell us today, just as the fallen heroes who lie in Arlington whisper through the ages. We honour them not only because they are guardians of our liberty, but because they embody the spirit of service; a willingness to find meaning in something greater than themselves. And yet, at this moment - a moment that will define a generation - it is precisely this spirit that must inhabit us all.
For as much as government can do and must do, it is ultimately the faith and determination of the American people upon which this nation relies. It is the kindness to take in a stranger when the levees break, the selflessness of workers who would rather cut their hours than see a friend lose their job which sees us through our darkest hours. It is the firefighter's courage to storm a stairway filled with smoke, but also a parent's willingness to nurture a child, that finally decides our fate.
Our challenges may be new. The instruments with which we meet them may be new. But those values upon which our success depends - hard work and honesty, courage and fair play, tolerance and curiosity, loyalty and patriotism - these things are old. These things are true. They have been the quiet force of progress throughout our history. What is demanded then is a return to these truths. What is required of us now is a new era of responsibility - a recognition, on the part of every American, that we have duties to ourselves, our nation, and the world, duties that we do not grudgingly accept but rather seize gladly, firm in the knowledge that there is nothing so satisfying to the spirit, so defining of our character, than giving our all to a difficult task.
This is the price and the promise of citizenship.
This is the source of our confidence - the knowledge that God calls on us to shape an uncertain destiny.
This is the meaning of our liberty and our creed - why men and women and children of every race and every faith can join in celebration across this magnificent mall, and why a man whose father less than sixty years ago might not have been served at a local restaurant can now stand before you to take a most sacred oath.
So let us mark this day with remembrance, of who we are and how far we have travelled. In the year of America's birth, in the coldest of months, a small band of patriots huddled by dying campfires on the shores of an icy river. The capital was abandoned. The enemy was advancing. The snow was stained with blood. At a moment when the outcome of our revolution was most in doubt, the father of our nation ordered these words be read to the people:
"Let it be told to the future world ... that in the depth of winter, when nothing but hope and virtue could survive...that the city and the country, alarmed at one common danger, came forth to meet (it)."
America, in the face of our common dangers, in this winter of our hardship, let us remember these timeless words. With hope and virtue, let us brave once more the icy currents, and endure what storms may come. Let it be said by our children's children that when we were tested we refused to let this journey end, that we did not turn back nor did we falter; and with eyes fixed on the horizon and God's grace upon us, we carried forth that great gift of freedom and delivered it safely to future generations

To my late great grandmother

I can't recall the very first time I met her, but she was a beautiful woman. Filled with so much Humour...she could turn a frown into a smile instantly. I called her gogo..because that was how my mum addressed her, and maybe because i found khokho a lil bit awkward. She was a woman with many names, the one we used was Gogo uShuwa. I know we hail from a place where u could probbaly find someone with a first name such as Peanut Butter or somethng of that nature...but we didn't call her uGogo uShuwa coz that was her name...she was called uGogo uShuwa because like my late Mamomdala they both liked to say ...akuthi shuwa. In Mutare they called her Gogo Matimati ...because she was a good Tomato farmer, and we nicknamed her Sosiji (Sausage) for anytime u went into town and asked wat she wanted all she would ask for was...isosiji mntanami. I am sure if u talk to any of her grand children or great-grandchildren we'd unearth more names. Come to think of it i don't know what her real name was...but that doesn't matter... she was a small resourceful and funny lady.

The last time I saw her,age had taken its toll on her, she'd lost all her teeth ...as a matter of fact she came with mum to visit while I was at Boarding school.I was so excited to see her, and yet she covered her mouth because she didn't want me to see her missing teeth, yet my young sis cracked one joke and we ere all roaring with laughter , and the hand that covered her mouth, uncovered it..and before u kno it her little smile and spark in her eyes had reduced me to tears.

I remember gng through the family album withher and we stumbled on a picture of her. It was her way back in her hayday. She was standing with her hubby rocking the standard hand by the waist pose. When I asked her wat was with the pose ...her answer was.. sasivela emtshadweni singela mali yebhasi, ngangigaya iplan. Looking at the said picture no one woulda guessed she had no bus fare.

Today I learnt this phenomenal woman passed away on the 23rd of Dec, 2008. I am a little bit sad...yeah a little...I kno she lived a good life. I was blessed to know such a soul, and not only kno her but also be a part of her. I don kno wat yr she was born and how old she was but I am convinced she'd passed the 100yr mark. I am also happy because her passing brought me closer to one long lost relative. She may be gone, but in my mind she'll be around and I'll talk and reminisce abt her because she was one wonderful lady, and I feel we were blessed, because in this life not everyone has the opportunity to meet their great grandma.

I feel as though I have lost my head... part of me is still in dreamland and hopes that when I wake up, I'll realize it has all been nothing but a nightmare.

Next week Wednesday I head to Sunnybrook for surgery, and nervous doesn't even begin to describe how I feel. Neva have I ever wished for a super power - something like the ability to freeze time... each day brings new fears with it. Today I went for my pre-assessment and as I sat in the waiting room, I felt as though I'd swallowed a hot potato. Just about anything could have triggered a downpour of tears.Ahha I have the right term(s) to describe how I feel - I am overwhelmed.

And you'd think by now I am used to the waiting rooms... but u neva get used to them. While most hospital staff are very pleasant, I feel as though a hospital waiting room is one deadly place. You look around and try and figure out why the other pple are there and I am sure they are doing the same. You see all sorts of things that make u even sicker than whne u came in. But that is nothing compared to the waiting room I have sat in as I wait to go for my ultrasound and/or mammogram. That one is the deadliest...it is very tiny, an in that small lil space are abt 4 lockers and 2 change rooms. There maybe about 6 or so chairs..and as we wait while dressed in hideous Hospital gowns nothing is worse than seeing all eyes on me with the most obvious question - wat is this lil one doing here. If Silence could kill, then no one dare walk into that waiting area. The only saving grace - if I should even call it saving is the telly that's on...wat do u kno they have the food network...like when I'm worried sick I could think of food... No one reads the Magazines in there...pple are just too busy clutching their purses and worrying abt the outcome...in that small world we forget abt the lastest Hollywood hook-ups, break-ups, scandals, cellulite, drastic weight gain or weight loss stories.

Then your name is called..and its in that room when u have been left alone, that is when u shed a tear to cry. At this point u don kno really why u are crying...could be the overwhelmed, fear combo. But u get your act together and by the time the technician... think tha'ts wat they are called come all the tears have dried..unless of course if your are like me and have tears that like to eascape from time to time.
Once u are done u put on your clothes...and forget abt that gruesome experience until u get the call from the doc's office 6 mnths down the road...and the whole cycle begins.

As I inch closer to Wednesday, I hang on to 3 things - the first being the amazing support of a few individuals, namely Sharon...who has been an anchor...she's been with me thru the thicks and thins and highs and lows of this journeys, and waited many a time for hours in waiting rooms for me. For Lynette, who not only has to deal with her own mother's battle with cancer, but has given every piece of advice she has, including the words I'll hang on to... to think positive because only my positive attitude can get me thru this, and Amy, who is taking a day off to come spend the day at the hospital with me on Wednesday , and for everyone who has kept me in their thoughts and Prayers.
The 2nd thing I hang on to is knowing that this is the beginning of the end...my whole breast-lump journey is coming to an end. This could mean no more hospital visits and undressing for just abt everyone in the medical field, and lastly and mostimportantly, I hang on my Faith in God,I know that he has seen me through all the stares, the pains the frustrations, and all moments of fear, and will continue to do so because I an do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

It has been 17hrs and a coupla minutes since we ushered in the New Year, and as I sit here I can't seem to make heads or tails of the next 364 days that lie ahead. I look back at the last 366 days and all i can do is be grateful, that I am still standing.

All i know that is I will be shifting a few gears around...that was quite evident in the way I welcomed the new year. The last day of 2008 , saw me give my place a thorough cleaning, and My 1st day saw me give my body a thorough cleaning both internally and externally...kinda like good-bye to 2008 junk. Who knows what else i'll be cleaning up...

As usual I have no resolutions...there are however one or 2 items that have found their way onto my bucket list.

For now, it feels like there is a lion residing in my belly...I need to cook me a sumptuous dinner. Happy New year to all, wishing you prosperity, good health and a year that is overflowing with blessings.